Rumours
by CSIsnickers101
Summary: Before Sara had a chance to interrupt and ask what they were doing Greg blurted out a question she never anticipated hearing. Snickers. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Rumours

Disclaimer - I don't own CSI.

A/N: Came up with this idea late last year and only now got round to writing it. I'm trying to do as much writing as I can because I've missed it so much. Parts of this chapter are in italics for flashbacks. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

"So, uh, what you got?" Sara asked anxiously.

"Nothing really, well nothing new," Nick insisted, putting on a false smile even she could see through. "Maybe a fibre or two but they look just the same as the ones you found at the scene."

"Good," she nodded. "Well, not good but at least you've got more than me."

"Yep," Nick nodded, staring round the room awkwardly, avoiding eye contact with his co-worker.

A very awkward and uncomfortable silence followed. Everything was awkward between them. It was almost painful. Soon the pair of them simply drifted back into processing evidence as they'd been doing before.

Nick and Sara had been paired up to investigate the murder of a man found in an alleyway a few blocks away from The Strip. It had been a fairly straight forward scene, nothing overly complicated or time consuming. Brass had started running with the idea that the man must have been mugged seen as he had no ID on him so was working on trying to identify him. So Nick and Sara stuck with trying to work out how he had died and why the man had been in the alleyway in the first place in the hope that they'd find out who he was in the process. They weren't having much success and the tension between the pair was becoming unimaginably suffocating. Working together was becoming unbearable.

"No, I don't care. I'm going to ask them," Greg's voice bellowed into the layout room, instantly grabbing the attention of its two quiet occupants.

"Greg, stop, you can't… you can't just ask," insisted Warrick as he came to a stop just behind Greg in the doorway.

"I'm finding out for sure," Greg threw over his shoulder before turning to address Nick and Sara with almost a stern look on his face.

Before Sara had a chance to interrupt and ask what they were doing Greg blurted out a question she never anticipated hearing.

"Are you two dating?" Greg asked as though it was the most normal thing in the world.

A moment of silence hung over them, his question almost echoing off the walls.

"Uh…," Nick gulped and stared off into space.

"Yes," Sara answered nonchalantly. "Well… we were."

"What do you mean, 'we were'?" Greg looked perplexed.

"Exactly that. We were dating," Sara replied, somehow keeping a straight and expressionless face.

"We broke up last week," Nick clarified, looking down and upset.

Greg's eyes widened. "Oh…, I, uh, um…," he stuttered.

Warrick gave Greg a light swat over the back of his head. "I'm sorry, I told him not to say anything," he offered, in an attempt to explain.

"There's no need to apologise," Sara insisted, forcing a smile. "We're good. Still friends. Right, Nicky?"

"Right," he nodded, his heart sinking as he heard her use his nickname.

This was the first case they had worked together since they'd broken up. It was hard for both of them, and they both knew that. Maybe that made it somewhat easier in a strange kind of way. So neither of them talked about it and kept things totally professional, or as professional as they possibly could. It wasn't an easy task but they knew that if they were to get justice for the John Doe that lay in the morgue and the family that he probably had then they had to learn to work together one way or another. It felt strange that they practically had to learn to work together all over again. Things were much different now than they once were, but that couldn't be helped. They took that risk and sadly this time it hadn't seemed to have paid off.

Sara could see the sadness in Nick's eyes, and knowing she'd put that sadness there was near on unbearable. She quickly looked away again. She never wanted to hurt him. Things just happened, words were said, and hearts were broken. That's what happens sometimes. Neither of them wished for it to end the way it did, Nick especially. The way he looked at her before was nothing in comparison to how he looked at her now. Nick would often just stare at Sara with a blank expression on his face, as though he didn't know how to feel. That made Sara angry. She wished he knew how to feel. She wanted him to be angry at her; she was angry at herself. Anger, betrayal, hatred, anything was better than nothing. How could he feel nothing?

Just then she looked up and turned her head to look into his eyes again, see if maybe he felt something now. What she saw took her breath away. She saw love. She thought at first she may have been mistaken but not many men had looked at her quite like that. Sara saw how Nick had once looked at her not so long ago. Love, adoration, desire. That was worse than seeing nothing. Her eyes filled with tears and she quickly excused herself from the room.

"Sara," Nick called after her in a desperate attempt to stop her leaving. He knew what he'd done. But he couldn't help himself, he couldn't help how he felt about her. He'd tried not to let it show but having just talked about the relationship that they'd once had he couldn't stop his emotions reaching the surface. He was only human after all.

"Should I… should one of us…," Greg stumbled over his words, still a bit in shock.

"Nah, she wouldn't want that," Nick shook his head.

"Should you, maybe…," Greg offered.

"She definitely wouldn't want that," Nick smiled weakly. "She'll be okay."

"I told him not to say anything," Warrick insisted, trying to comfort his friend.

Nick shrugged. "You know the truth now."

"I'll speak to you later," Warrick insisted, the tone of his voice saying that there was no room for arguments.

Nick nodded as Warrick pulled Greg backwards out of the room before he could say anything else. As soon as they were out of sight he removed his latex gloves and rubbed his hands over his face. He let out the mother of all sighs. This was not how he'd imagined his friends finding out about his relationship with Sara, or rather former relationship. At the start he couldn't wait to tell everyone but that's exactly what Sara didn't want to do, she wanted to wait and see where things went. It turned out that she was right, as she always was. Things hadn't worked out between them apparently, according to Sara. Nick supposed that this situation was probably worse than the whole team knowing about their relationship when it had started and watching it fall apart. Now they were going to pick up on every little thing, even the smallest of tension between them. And they'd probably point it out too. His day had just got a whole lot worse.

As Warrick and Greg walked away from the layout room they headed in separate directions. Greg still hadn't gotten his head round what had happened and naturally felt very guilty. Warrick aimed for the break room. When he turned the corner he saw Sara heading straight towards him.

"Urgh," she exclaimed in frustration as she quickly turned around to head back in the direction she'd come from.

"Wait, Sara," Warrick jogged slightly to catch up with her.

"What?" she sighed, narrowing her eyes a little.

"I just wanted to see if you were alright."

"Absolutely fantastic," she glared at him, being sarcastic. "But you won't care about me once you and Nick have a good gossip about what happened."

"Sara, don't be like that…," Warrick reached out for her arm as she tried to walk away from him.

"Has he not told you I'm the bad guy in all of this yet?" Sara questioned as she pulled her arm out of his grasp and briskly walked away.

Warrick sighed and contemplated following her, but relented. In the end he decided she just needed some time to calm down.

"Won't talk to you either, huh?" Nick asked, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back against the wall behind Warrick.

Warrick jumped slightly as he turned round to the voice coming from behind him. Seeing who it was, he offered his friend a sympathetic smile. "What happened, Nicky?"

Nick chose to answer with his own question. "Have you had breakfast yet?"

Within an hour Nick and Warrick were sat in a diner booth waiting to be served their bacon and egg breakfasts. Nick was unusually quiet, and looked somewhat glum and disheartened.

Warrick chose to clear the air. "I can't apologise enough for Greg asking about…"

"It's fine," Nick interrupted. "You didn't know what had happened."

"That just makes me feel more guilty," he insisted. "We should have known, we're your friends. We should have noticed something was different."

"And we probably should have told you, but you can see why we didn't, in case this happened," Nick shrugged, looking out the window.

"Well, I suppose I had my suspicions," Warrick commented thoughtfully.

"How come?"

"There were some, rumours…," he voiced his opinion.

"Yeah, I bet there was," Nick simply rolled his eyes.

"We really had no idea you two had been dating," Warrick shook his head in despair, assumingly still slightly in shock. "I can't believe we didn't notice sooner."

"Thought there were rumours?"

"There's always rumours," Warrick countered. "And yes, I thought there was something between you but I didn't think either of you had acted on it. You two had been dating the whole time, and we had no idea."

"Yeah, well, had being the operative word," Nick sighed. "It doesn't matter anyway, it's over."

"What happened, Nicky?"

"It just didn't work out, simple as that," Nick stared around the room.

"How about we start from the beginning," Warrick suggested. "How did it start?"

"By accident really," Nick smiled slightly at the memory. "We didn't plan it, it just happened. But neither of us regretted it, at the time anyway."

"_Okay, okay, truth or dare," Sara declared, sipping on her coffee._

"_Do you wanna go first?" Nick asked._

"_No, you can," she insisted, relenting and allowing him to ask the first question._

"_Okay then. Truth or dare?"_

"_Truth," she decided._

"_Have you ever had a one night stand?" Nick asked with interest almost instantly._

"_Really?" Sara raised her eyebrows, giving him a look. "I thought you'd have asked something better than that."_

"_It's something I've always wondered about you," he insisted, pursing his lips to prevent a large smile creeping onto his face._

_Sara cleared her throat and shifted rather uncomfortably in her seat. She supposed it was a fair question, a question that she may have been likely to have asked him when her turn came. She took a long sip of her coffee before inhaling sharply and answered, "Yes, a few. But I'm not exactly proud of it."_

"_Really?" Nick seemed almost shocked. "I never really saw you as that type of woman."_

"_Well, I guess there's a lot about me that you don't know yet," she stated correctly, looking slightly smug. "Now it's my turn. Truth or dare?"_

"_Truth."_

"_Have you ever had a one night stand?" she asked._

"_Come on, ask me a different question," Nick gave her a look._

"_What's wrong with the question I just asked?" Sara wondered, feigning innocence._

"_I've already asked it, and you can't ask a question twice," he stated._

"_Since when?"_

"_Since right now," he insisted. "I know that you know the answer to that question anyways. I know what people say about me."_

_Suddenly the situation had turned rather sombre. Nick looked utterly dejected. Maybe playing truth or dare hadn't been the best idea she'd ever had. He'd invited her round to his apartment for breakfast, and it made a lovely change from her usual boring morning routine. Once breakfast had been eaten she had been reluctant to go home, so Nick had suggested she stay for a while and they could just watch some TV, maybe even a movie. Flicking through the channels made them remember when they were so glad to sleep during the daylight hours; there was never anything decent on the TV in the morning. So they'd just sat and talked for a while. Sara had complained about Greg a couple of times, and moaned about some new day shift tech who clearly had a crush on her. But Nick was more than willing to listen to her, to let her get the things that frustrated her off her chest. Now she thought she'd upset him, and that was the last thing she wanted. She hated seeing him like this, all sad and serious. You could normally count on Nick to lighten your mood in even the slightest way. _

"_You know, perceptions can be deceiving, I think so anyway," she offered, breaking the silence. "And I don't like to listen to any of that stuff, to rumours of any kind. I like to judge people by who they are."_

_Nick finally made eye contact with her again and gave her a smile. "Go on, ask me another question."_

_The time had pasted fairly quickly that morning, though by this point it was pretty much the afternoon. They could do that though, pass the time with ease. It was part of their characters, and very much part of their friendship. Their typical banter had ensued, along with their usual flirtation._

"_Truth or dare?" he asked again, a short time later._

"_Truth," Sara smiled._

"_Oh, come on," he exclaimed. "Live a little. I'm gonna ask you again; truth or dare?"_

"_Fine. Dare," Sara rolled her eyes at him._

"_Good," Nick grinned triumphantly. He took a short moment to pause and think about what his dare would be. He'd already had a few options floating around inside his head since Sara had first suggested they play the game but one idea had stuck out and just wouldn't leave him. What she'd said before had given him courage that perhaps there was something there between them, even the tiniest of something's. Truth be told he was taking advantage of the situation, but who wouldn't? He'd always considered himself a chancer, and this was his chance to push the boat out. He was going to see just how much she'd let him get away with. "Would you kiss me?" he blurted out._

"_Excuse me?"_

"_Let me rephrase that. I dare you to kiss me," he announced._

"_What?" Sara looked perplexed._

"_You chose dare, right? So I'm daring you to kiss me," Nick tried to explain himself and looked almost smug in the process._

"_Yeah, I chose dare, but you can't do that…," Sara fumbled over her words._

"_But I can, and I have," he grinned. "You're not scared, are you?"_

"_What? No," she shook her head. "It's just…"_

"_So what's the problem then?"_

_Sara pursed her lips and let out a sigh. She couldn't believe he'd dared her to kiss him. Who does that? She tried to make out like it wasn't a big deal, that it was the most normal thing in the world. But of course it was a big deal. This isn't the type of thing that usually happened to her. He knew she was stubborn and wouldn't even consider backing down, but that would have been why he'd asked. But it'd thrown her as to why he'd dared her to kiss him; she wondered why now. She tried her best to glare at him, thinking he looked way too arrogant. He was enjoying it. He was probably thinking that despite her stubborn and determined nature that she would back down, and he would win. It was a win win situation for him._

_Sara mustered up all her resolve and courage, grabbed Nick by the collar of his shirt and pulled him into a rather fiery kiss. Nick's eyes bulged in complete surprise as he sat there totally stunned and bewildered. After a few seconds she pulled away, but Nick's expression remained the same._

"_Happy now?" she crossed her arms over her chest; it was her turn to be smug._

"_Wow…," was all Nick could say, before he cleared his throat. "Yeah, I'm, uh… I'm happy."_

"_Good," she smiled at him._

_Suddenly their eyes met. They couldn't look away. In that moment they knew things had changed between them, for good. And they hoped, for the better._

Warrick tried to look optimistic as he continued a minute or so later, bringing Nick back into reality. "When did it start?"

"Um…," he trailed off and smiled at the waitress as she handed over their plates of food, allowing him a few seconds to think. "About 3 months ago."

"That long ago?" Warrick raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"I guess we're good at keeping secrets," he gave him a weak smile.

"We found out eventually," Warrick insisted, almost defensively.

"After we'd broken up."

"And surely that should prove something to you, to both of you. It was only last week that you broke up, so things can easily be salvaged. There is clearly still some chemistry there," Warrick offered. "There's definitely something there."

"Oh, I doubt it. Sara made that very clear. You guys were just slow, that's all. You saw something that was there once, but whatever it was it's gone now. Whatever we had is gone now," Nick frowned, only making eye contact with his plate.

"I don't believe you," Warrick argued.

"Things have to go back to normal," Nick insisted. "That's what she wants."

"But things won't go back to normal, will they?" Warrick reasoned. "You must know that. I'm really sorry things didn't work out. But you two could be great together."

"You think so?" Nick wondered, not looking convinced as he lifted his head to meet his friends' gaze.

"I know so," he smiled.

"Well, can you tell Sara that?" Nick scoffed, turning his attention back to the window as he mindlessly played with the food on his plate. "She won't listen to me."

"So Sara ended it?" Warrick surmised.

"Wow, you should really work for the police, you know that?" Nick said sarcastically.

"Come on, play fair here," Warrick gave him a look.

"Yeah, she ended it," Nick nodded reluctantly. "And I have no idea why."

"Seriously? She gave you no reason why?" he asked, incredulously.

"Yep, she ended it, without any explanation. I asked and I asked, but she can barely look me in the eye anymore let alone talk to me," Nick looked completely deflated. "I don't know if it's something I've done or said because she won't tell me so I can't do anything about it, I can't make things better again."

"That doesn't sound like the Sara we know," Warrick insisted, looking a bit confused as to why she would behave like that. "There must be a reason why, surely?"

"It had started out so good, you know? I mean, the pair of us were practically walking on eggshells at first because it was completely new to both of us but it felt different, felt right. I really thought that we could have gone somewhere, that we could have had so much together, but she ruined all that," Nick hung his head.

"Oh, come on you don't mean that. I know you better than that. You're just hurt…," Warrick began.

"Damn right I'm hurt," Nick interrupted him. "I put so much into our relationship, and for what? I kept it a secret from everyone because that's what she wanted despite the fact I was desperate to tell you all. I loved her, and she through it right back in my face."

"I know you're angry but you need to ask yourself if you still want to be with her," Warrick insisted.

"Of course I want to be with her," he exclaimed. "But my feelings count for nothing. She's made that perfectly clear."

"You need to talk to her, tell her how you feel," Warrick told him.

"She already knows exactly how I feel."

"Then tell her again," Warrick maintained. "Don't give up. You love her, right?

"More than I thought I could love anyone," replied Nick.

"Then don't let her forget it," Warrick said softly. "Remind her how good things were, and how good they could be again."

"But she won't listen to me," he looked Warrick in the eye, showing him just how upset the situation made him.

"You have to try," Warrick wasn't going to back down.

"Urgh," he grunted in despair.

"You've gotta fight for her," Warrick insisted, trying to build up his friend's spirit. "You need to show her you still love her."

Nick nodded. "Nothing beats falling in love with your best friend," he stated matter of factly, sounding rather like a wise old man.

"Wow, Nicky, you've got it bad," he chuckled lightly.

Nick laughed in spite of himself, rubbing his hands over his face and mumbling, "Yeah, I know. It's pathetic."

Warrick shook his head. "You know what you want and that can't be a bad thing."

"Do you think so?" Nick didn't seem to be convinced.

Warrick nodded. "Just talk to her, remind her how you feel and how good things were when you were together, make things right. Then kiss, or do whatever it is you do to make up and put this behind you," he insisted. "Then be happy."

Thank you for reading. The last part will be up soon. Please review.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer - I don't own CSI.

A/N: Thanks to those of you who reviewed the first chapter. Here's the second part. Again, the flashback is in italics. Enjoy.

Chapter 2

Meanwhile, Sara was slumped down on her sofa, feeling sorry for herself. What an awful day it had been. As if working with her ex boyfriend wasn't bad enough Greg and Warrick had to find out about her not so successful relationship with Nick, and by now probably everyone at work knew as well. Fantastic. She didn't think she could stand the looks and the stares, the muffled whispers every time she entered a room. The lab was infamous for the gossip that always had a habit of circulating through each room, from person to person like Chinese whispers, and the nightshift was the worst for it. She never listened to the nonsense people used to say, knowing that most of it were lies or at the very least stretches of the imagination, of the truth, but this would be very different. This time she knew the rumours were true. She was never one to run away from her problems but she was seriously considering packing a bag and leaving. But where would she go? Besides, it wasn't fair to leave the graveyard shift a man down, plus she didn't like to think of everyone worrying about her if she just upped and left. She wondered how much Nick would worry about her, how much he still thought about her even now. Why did things have to be so complicated?

She'd left on time at the end of the shift out of habit. Since she and Nick had begun dating she'd found herself leaving on time more often, leaving when perhaps in the past she would have stayed, so she could be with him. They'd go for breakfast, watch a movie or just relax, and forget about the horrible crimes they had to investigate even just for a little while. For the first time in a very long time she had more in her life than work. But now things were going back to how they used to be. She never expected it to be this way, to be so lonely. But things had gone downhill so dramatically, their relationship had fallen apart practically over night after she ended it, so naturally it'd been a big adjustment that they'd both had to make quickly in order to avoid suspicion. That hadn't worked out so well. She never expected it to hurt as much as it did. Now she remembered why she liked being single, you never get hurt or disappointed. Despite the fact that it was her fault that their relationship was over, it still hurt like hell. She also remembered why she was always so defensive of her emotions and always found it hard to trust people. When she had her wall up to protect her from everyone and everything, she couldn't get close to people and she couldn't get hurt. But Nick had chipped away at her, and let her feel comfortable and safe enough to let her protective wall disappear. He'd made her feel safe enough to love him. But that had been a bad idea.

Catherine had given her some 'friendly advice' before she'd left. Catherine had told her to make up with Nick, because they were meant to be and that whatever had happened couldn't have been that bad. And she was right, Sara knew that, but it wasn't that simple. Catherine gave her some tough love, as she'd put it, but the words needed to be said. She went on to rant about the mistakes she'd made in her life and told Sara she didn't want her to make the same ones. She ended with something that had quite surprised Sara.

"Us girls have to stick together," Catherine stated as she walked away, leaving Sara alone with her thoughts.

And that was how she'd been, alone with her thoughts ever since.

_Sara curled herself up on her sofa as she heard her door open and close. She exhaled deeply, letting her shoulders fall, as she heard footsteps approach her. _

"_I got your message," Nick said, his voice laced with concern and his brow furrowed. "What's wrong?"_

"_We need to talk," Sara answered, her voice small._

"_Okay," Nick lowered himself down on to the sofa next to her, placing a hand on her knee. "What's up?"_

"_We need to break up," she answered simply, avoiding his gaze._

"_What?" Nick raised his eyebrows in shock._

"_We need to break up," she repeated herself._

"_Is this some kind of joke?" Nick wondered, letting out a slightly nervous laugh, not believing what he was hearing._

"_Do I look like I'm joking?" Sara countered, looking up._

"_But I don't understand…," he shook his head._

"_I'm sorry," she insisted, her lower lip quivering. "But our relationship is over, as of right now."_

"_You can't do this," he maintained, his voice desperate for her to see sense._

"_I can," Sara argued. "It's not working. It wasn't going to last anyway, so it's better to just get this over and done with."_

"_No, that's not true," Nick protested._

"_Either way, we're over," she stated._

"_Can you at least tell me why?" he asked, just about understanding what was happening._

_Sara shook her head. "Can you go now please?"_

"_Tell me why and I'm gone," he insisted._

"_We're over, what does it matter?" she questioned._

"_Of course it matters," he maintained. "I wanna know why."_

"_Nick, please, just go," tears slowly began to fall down her cheeks._

"_We can work this out," Nick gave one last ditch attempt to reason with her._

"_Go! Just go!" she yelled, her voice croaky. "Please… just go."_

_Nick stood up and let out a sigh. "Can we talk later?"_

_Sara nodded. She'd say just about anything to get him to leave._

_And eventually he did, after standing in the middle of her living room staring into space and admiring her décor for a couple of minutes, outwardly looking confused and in turmoil as to what to do. Her heart ached the moment he exited her apartment, and tears wracked her body for the majority of the morning._

Sara sat mindlessly watching some documentary on the Discovery Channel, her thoughts whirling round and round in her head. As you would expect, this wasn't how she'd wanted to spend the morning, reliving everything that had happened, every tiny detail of their relationship. This wasn't how she'd wanted things to go, or how she'd wanted things to end up. But life has a funny way of interfering when good things actually start happening to her. She'd come to live with that. And she only hoped she could come to live with her decision to end things with Nick.

Suddenly there was a knock at her door, startling her slightly. She want expecting anyone so it was probably someone selling something. She really wasn't in the mood to talk to people, to be polite, so she ignored it. But the person on the other side knocked again. Sara let out a frustrated sigh and stood up from her sofa, rubbing her forehead. A few seconds later she reached the door and opened it, doing her best not to look as depressed as she felt.

"Hey, Sara," Nick smiled sheepishly at her.

"Oh," Sara raised an eyebrow in surprise, and pulled her lips into a tight smile. "Nick."

He walked past her into her living room before she even had the chance to say anything else, or invite him in.

"Come on in then," Sara scoffed.

"We need to talk," he stated simply, turning to face her as she closer the door.

"About what, exactly?" she asked, impatiently.

"You know damn well what, Sara," he gave her a stern look.

"What is there to talk about? Everyone knows now, you should be happy," she insisted, refusing to make eye contact with him.

"How can I be happy when you won't even talk to me, won't even look at me? How can I be happy when our relationship is over?" Nick questioned somewhat rhetorically.

"Sometimes these things happen," she shrugged her shoulders.

"No, not to us," he maintained.

"Nick, there isn't an us anymore," she finally made eye contact with him.

"I wanna know why. Why did you break up with me?"

Sara sighed, looking at him with sad eyes.

"I've just had breakfast with Warrick," Nick stated, as if that solved everything.

"Good for you," she gave him a confused glance. "Give him all the gory details?"

"No," he shook his head. "I told him the truth."

"I don't see why you spoke to him about it anyway, he doesn't need to know. What happened is our business and no one else's," she insisted.

"I just wanted to know if he would think that I deserved to know why you ended our relationship, or if it was me being unreasonable," Nick answered. "And he made me see that I'm not ready to give up on us yet."

"Can you leave now, please? I'm really tired and I just want to…"

Nick shook his head, insistently. "I'm not going anywhere until you answer my question. I'll stand here all night if I have to, but I have to know why."

Sara sighed in frustration. "I suppose it wasn't very fair of me to just expect you to take it or to give up on our relationship if I never gave a good enough reason as to why I ended it. It is too cliché to say it's not you, it's me? Probably, but it's the truth."

"Well, you've let me in. That's a start," Nick smiled sheepishly. "It's an improvement on yesterday."

"Technically, I didn't let you in, you barged your way in," Sara corrected him.

"So that you couldn't slam the door in my face," he insisted, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smile.

"Why have you come round, Nick?" she sighed.

"To know why you broke up with me," he told her, yet again.

Sara rolled her eyes, and opened her mouth to speak.

"Please, just tell me why, that's all I ask," Nick pleaded, jumping in before she could argue with him. "I want to fix whatever it is that I did wrong."

"You didn't do anything wrong," she told him. "And why does knowing the reason mean so much to you? It won't change anything."

"There must be a reason, there's always a reason," Nick stated. "Anyone else and it wouldn't matter as much, anyone else would be easy to get over. But you Sara, you have well and truly taken over me. You're all I think about, all I care about."

"Well, that'll have to change," she muttered.

"I gave everything I had to make our relationship work. I put my heart on the line for you, potentially my career on the line for you. But I didn't care. I wanted us to work so bad. I wanted to be with you. I couldn't, I can't, imagine anything better than waking up next to you every morning," he did his best to explain, anger and desperation coming through in his voice. "And then you just break up with me. So yeah, I wanna know why. I think you owe me that much."

"So your ego's a bit bruised, huh? Didn't expect it would be me who ended our relationship? You thought that if it was going to be anyone it would be you, right?" Sara shook her head at him in disbelief. "Is that all you care about?"

"Stop twisting what I say," he demanded. "I care about you, and our relationship. I care about the fact that you ended it without giving me a reason why. I just want to know why, so I can fix it."

"You can't fix everything, Nick," she stated solemnly. "You can't fix us."

"Just tell me what I can do to make it better?" Nick begged.

Sara sat down on her sofa, wishing the ground would open up and swallow her whole.

Nick sat down next to her on the sofa, sighing. "Look, can't we behave like adults."

Sara reluctantly nodded, folding her arms over her chest in a defensive manner.

"You and me, we were good together, great in fact. And we can be again. It was you and me, against the world. Don't you want that again? I want us to be together, forever. And I know that sounds so cheesy but it's the truth. I want us to do all the normal things people do, like get married and have kids. I want us to have a normal life. I want us to do all those things, all the things that we should be looking forward to in our future."

"But that's exactly why we can't," Sara mumbled under her breath. "I'm scared about the future."

"Me too. But we can't stay scared forever. I don't want to waste anymore time. For so long I never did anything about how I felt for you, so I want to make the most of every single minute that we have together," Nick placed a hand on top of her arm.

"Nick, the reason I ended it was because...," she began.

"It doesn't matter," he shook his head. "As long as you're willing to give us another go, it doesn't matter."

Sara shook her head, choosing to tell him the truth. "Nicky, things were getting serious. I was thinking about our future, and I've never done that kind of thing before. Being with you was so different than being with anyone else I've ever been with, and it scared me. I look at you and I think you deserve so much more than me, someone that will give you the life that you deserve. I would never forgive myself if I could never give you that."

"I only want you, darlin'," he looked her square in the eye. "You're the only one for me. No one else, just you."

"Well, you'll have to get over that, and forget about me. You have to move on, meet someone else," Sara asserted, struggling to keep her emotions at bay. "I don't deserve you."

"No one falls in love by choice, it's by chance," Nick stated. "We can work this out. We can go back to how we were, forget this ever happened."

"It's not that simple," she sighed. "We can't get back together. You have to move on. It's better this way."

"Oh yeah, better for who?"

"For you, obviously," she told him. "I'm not the right person for you."

"Surely I'm the one that should decide that," Nick raised an eyebrow. "And from where I'm sitting this isn't better for me."

"You have to accept my answer," she told him, looking away. "You wanted to know why so now you know. You can leave now."

"Sar, please...," he trailed off.

"We can't spend the rest of our lives talking about it," she sighed. "You need to accept that what we had is gone now, so you need to move on."

"But what if I don't want to move on?" Nick questioned. "What if I want to be with you?"

"Well, I'm sorry but you're going to be disappointed."

"Good things don't come easy," he stated. "But that doesn't mean we should give up."

"Would you just give it a rest already? You're like a broken record," Sara exclaimed.

"Babe, I know this is scary for you, it is for me too, and I know I probably didn't help by saying all that stuff about what I'd like to do in the future but we can't let our relationship go because of something so trivial," he insisted, half-heartedly.

"Oh well, I'm sorry my reason isn't good enough for you but it's the only one I've got," Sara glared. "The fact is I don't feel ready to commit to a relationship and I don't want you to wait around for me because that's not fair. I don't want you to be stuck with me for the rest if your life and be unhappy. That's the last thing I want. So please, just go."

"Leaving won't change how I feel about you," he reminded her. "I get it. I understand how you must feel but I can't give up on us; I won't give up on us. I love you."

"Well, I don't love you," she snapped, deadpan. "I never did."

"No, that's not true...," Nick furrowed his brow.

"I lied to you," she insisted, standing firm. "I am a horrible person and I don't deserve you. I never have. I have way too much baggage for you to handle. I don't want to be a burden to you. If I was you I would stay as far away from me as I possibly could."

"No, I can't do that," Nick refused to agree with her. "What we had was real. What we had was special. Being with you meant more to me than any other relationship I've ever had. You make me a better person. I need you as much as you need me."

"You don't need me," she argued.

"I will do everything I can do to make things better, to put things back to how they were. There is a reason we were together, we can't forget that," he maintained, refusing to give up.

"The past is in the past, Nick," she sighed.

Nick looked at her incredulously. "You make me crazy, you know that? You drive me crazy. Actually, I think I'd go as far as to say you make me insane. But that's what I love about you. I love everything about you, even the fact that you have to always be right. Because that's who you are, and I love you for who you are."

"You really shouldn't...," she mumbled under her breath, hanging her head.

"I love you for who you are, for all the flaws you claim to have. I love you for all of that, for all the ups and downs. I love you for the amazing person you are," he reiterated, trying to convince her that he meant it.

"Love is just a chemical reaction," she protested.

"You're wrong," he argued. "Yes, technically love is no more than chemical reactions but in reality it's so much more than that."

Sara averted her eyes as they began welling up with tears. "Please, stop…"

"Urgh," he scoffed in frustration. "What do you want from me?"

"I'm sorry, okay," she maintained, answering honestly. "I never meant for it to turn out this way. We should never have started dating."

"Okay, here we go," he scoffed. "I knew this was coming. I knew you were bound to have regrets about us. Are you trying to make me regret being with you? Well I can't, and I won't."

"I don't regret anything, and I don't want you to either," she insisted. "What I want is for you to recognise and understand that our relationship is over."

"What about all the things we did? All the things we were going to do? What about our future together?" He looked at her, his eyes pleading.

"I don't deserve a future with you. And I was stupid to think that I did," Sara took a deep breath to try and calm herself down. "It's all just memories now."

"We can make new memories."

"Making new memories doesn't get rid of old ones," Sara argued.

"You can't just push me away, Sar," Nick insisted. "It's not gonna work this time."

"It has too," she maintained.

"You always know the right things to say," Nick let out a sigh, softening his voice as he continued. "I get it that you're scared, because we didn't really know where our relationship was going, and we still don't. We're never gonna know, all we know is what we want to happen but whether that actually happens is up to us. I want a life with you. I want to grow old with you. And nothing you can do or say will make me change my mind."

Sara stood up and paced the living room floor, running her hands through her hair. "This isn't easy for me you know. It's not easy letting go of what we had. Things won't go back to how they were last week, it's impossible."

"I disagree," he insisted.

"You don't understand," she countered.

"Then make me understand," Nick told her, practically begging.

"It got too much for me. It all got on top of me and I freaked out. I never wanted to end it but I felt I had no other choice. Nicky, I...," she paused to compose herself, and blink back the tears burning in her eyes. "I love you, I do. But that's the problem. I can't get my heart broken again, I just can't. I don't want to be messed about with again. I don't want my feelings to be taken for granted. Definitely not by you. I'm sorry, but that's the truth."

"Don't you trust me?" he asked, standing up to face her.

Sara only nodded, unable to get words out at that moment.

"Well, then it goes without saying that I'd never do anything to hurt you, never on purpose anyway," he told her. "Let me prove that to you."

Sara gulped and chose to turn and walk away from him instead. She made her way towards the front door. "I think you should go now."

"I love you, okay," Nick announced, stopping Sara in her tracks.

"Don't do this," she insisted, turning quickly to face him again.

"I love you, Sara," he continued, ignoring her complaints. "I love you more than I have ever loved anyone. I love you more than I thought it was possible to ever love someone. I never meant to fall in love with you but I have. And no matter how hard I try not to feel the way I do for you, to not feel anything for you at all, I can't help it. But if I'm being honest I've not tried very hard at all. I don't want to try and not love you."

Sara raised her eyebrows in complete surprise as the words came out of his mouth. She felt very embarrassed and self conscious following his outburst but he didn't seem to care.

It took everything she had not to start crying. "Do you mean it?"

"Of course I do, I wouldn't say it otherwise," he vowed.

Sara took a deep breath and looked away, her mind racing.

"And another thing…," Nick went to continue but was cut off.

He was caught completely by surprise when Sara practically pounced on him, her lips falling on his. After the initial shock, he kissed her back, wrapping his arms around her waist possessively. Sara pulled away again a few moments later.

"What was that for?" Nick asked, taking her hands in his.

"I had to shut you up somehow," she smiled. "I'm sorry…"

"You don't have to say it," he smiled back, bringing a hand up to her cheek. "Actions speak louder than words."

With that she moved in and their lips met in a sweet and simple kiss. That was how it began anyway, but it gradually became more passionate and meaningful. If only they were in the lab for everyone to see, that would stifle those rumours. Though he was sure that when they both arrived late for work that night, which they were sure to do if he had his way, that the rumours would be once and for all silenced.

Thank you for reading. I've got a few more story ideas that I'm working on so watch this space. Please review.


End file.
